The Task

Kam had given me a task to do to prepare for the move North.. I did not understand everything that he and Tarra spoke about. and I did not need to.. he told me to prepare all the hides I could find.. And so..I took that task to heart.. and stayed close to the clan fires working quietly.

I knew it would soon be time to start getting the wagons ready.. making sure tarps were fixed and checking the reins.. anything leather was our responsibility.. I began with my own wagon. and found that the leather band had come loose of the back wheel.. I spent a great deal of the day trying to fix it.. but I was not strong enough. . Later that night at the fires Teng offered to help.. and inexchange for helping his mate with their son.. I said sure... I had his son with him some part of the day.. He seemed very interested in one of he baby verr... but he was not trouble to watch over and I actually had a good time..

It was abit sad to see his mother come get him.. but that is where he belongs. and I had alot of work to still do.. I had Seve's vest nearly done.. just a few little touches here and there..From the outside it looked like a plain brown vest. that is until you opened it.. I took ribbons of the same color as the skirt.. and sewed them on the inside edges of the vest.. some might see a splash of color when she walked but really the color was for her..

My mother had been settled into her wagons. but she slept in mine the 1st few nights.. We did not talk about my father.. She had been with him a very long time.. I knew no matter she loved him and would miss him.. But I did not broach the subject with her.. not yet... She needed time... no one really said anything that he was dead.. My brothers knew I think.. men seem to gossip more than women sometimes.. but I do not think even they knew for sure.. No matter which way you cut it. he had vanished from site.. A part of me was sad that I had not really known him as he was to my mother.

But it was nice to have her close.. I missed talking to someone that would not interject their own veiw into my questions.. it was nice to have someone that would not judge me just sit and listen.. I think I filled her head with so much she just fell asleep.. She is not ready to mix with those of the 1st fires yet.. She is content to visit her friends at the outerwagons.. but at least she is close to me again... I need that as much as she does. I avoided the fires today.. I just did not need the tension that seems to fill me when I am there sometimes.. not always.. I guess it depends on who is there.. There are many times I feel like an outsider looking in again... some sit and whisper to each other.. or give looks.. Sme just outrite ignore you... Its their loss I suspose.. I belong there I fought for my place and no one can keep me from it.I just sat on my step. worn out.. frustrated and very very sleepy... but the stars were out.. and calling me.. as I headed for the herds and my knoll of soft grass.